Children: To be or not to be?

This article got me thinking.    
 
It is an interesting little gossip column about George Clooney’s new girlfriend.  The delicious diva let it be known that she does not intend to ever have children, fulfilling her need to feel maternal with dogs instead.  The article is supportive of her decision.  However, she has received a lot of negative feedback about her decision, some calling her selfish and are wondering what our world is coming to when such affluent people have chosen not to breed (my apologies for the “dog speak”, I swear it is my primary language).  
 
Those comments hit close to home.  As my 31st birthday approaches, I sometimes think I can hear my eggs cracking, shriveling up and dissolving into space… my chances of ever having a healthy child of my own, narrowing as quickly as a cat’s pupils in bright light.  With nearly three years of marriage under our belts, my husband, Scott and I have spent a lot of time talking about having children.  We are both nurturing people that love little ones.  Yet, neither of us feels a strong need to have our own.  Don’t get me wrong, if a miracle baby were to come along, we would be THRILLED.  But, it isn’t something that we feel compelled to do. 
 
I used to think that our decision was purely selfish.  We were having way too much fun to have a little one crash our party.  But, as we have gotten older and more responsible, my view has changed.  Instead of feeling that it is selfish not to have children, I really feel that it would be selfish for us TO HAVE children and that feeling has largely been developed through my involvement in animal rescue. 
 
Scott and I have every intention of having children in our lives eventually.  But, when the time comes, it is unlikely that they will be our biological children.  There is no known reason we can’t have our own.  It is simply that over the last several years, we have been blessed to love hundreds of orphaned babies, all of whom were unwanted at one point or another.  We have been overwhelmed by the amount of life there is out there with no one to care for it.  While all our babies to date have had fur, reading the newspaper on any given day is enough to convince me that there are kids out there that need us too. 
 
That is the reason that Scott and I attended a session about becoming foster parents for children.  While there, we were interviewed by a lady that seemed extremely leery of our intentions and questioned us on why such a young couple would choose to have foster children, rather than their own.  It really struck me at that moment how much easier it would be to just “make our own” – a little DIY project, rather than the months of classes, home inspections and continual screenings.  It really made me think about how easy it is to become parents and how our society just expects that everyone will. 
 
Bringing a life into this world is a HUGE deal.  So, why are we, as a society, so complacent with the idea that everyone SHOULD  do it?  This article reminded me that some aren’t just complacent, but actually judge people for deciding NOT to.  There is nothing in this world that EVERYONE is good at – so why do we assume that EVERYONE is good at parenting and thus, should be one?  Or, are we just okay with sub-par parenting for the unlucky ones?  These are questions that haunt me when I review applications for dogs.  Nearly a third to one-half of the people that apply for our rescue dogs are denied.  Sometimes it simply isn’t a good match, others don’t have the proper set-up, but often, they just don’t seem like good pet owners.  We don’t think they will take good enough care of our rescue dog, yet most of these applicants are parents.  Where was their application for that?  
 
Please don’t get me wrong.  There are a LOT of great parents out there.  Most of our closest friends have had babies in the last few years and are shining examples of excellent parenthood.  But, I certainly hope that someday, people will stop judging those that choose not to have children and take a hard look at reality.